Internet dating sites addiction to pain
The more a man spends time with porn, the more his mind becomes conditioned to the novelty, variety, and convenience that porn provides.
Many studies have shown that the more a man watches porn, the more he devalues the attractiveness of “average people.” In the book Pornography rewires the brain, training him to desire the hormonal rush from porn instead of sex with you.
Many men, and an increasing percentage of women, are finding themselves helpless in the face of Internet temptations.
After years of porn viewing, often starting at a young age, what started as a curiosity became a pattern, which became a habit, which became a compulsion.
While many addicts want a high frequency of sex (see #3), as the addiction escalates, they begin to lose interest in their partner.
They become desensitized to other forms of pleasure—even sexual intercourse—preferring the buzz they get from porn.
Many men describe it as feeling “numb.” Like any addict, a porn addict will begin to revolve his life around the next buzz.
A man’s belief that no one knows where he is going online gives a false sense of security: “What I’m doing online is my own business, and it isn’t hurting anyone else.” The more a man becomes entrenched in porn, the more he begins to lose interest in real world relationships, especially with his wife and children.
But turn on an Internet device with unlimited pages of novelty, and boom, the plumbing works.
On the other end of the spectrum, some men entrenched in porn want to act out their fantasies in the real world.
If the Internet histories are constantly empty, he may be clearing his history to cover his tracks.
The late psychologist Al Cooper wrote that three factors often contribute to an Internet porn addiction: affordability (most porn is cheap or free), accessibility (it can be accessed nearly anywhere), and anonymity (no one has to know what you’re doing).
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He may demand to be left alone with his computer or become irritable if he can’t get online.